Dear diary,
Things suddenly had a twisted ending. What i expected came earlier than i supposed. What was i supposed to do ? I'm not running away from the reality, i'm facing it. But c'mon, no matter how much i do , i'm gonna be considered a destroyer. & I don't like being a destoyer when i was the on who gave in so much and had nothing in return.
I want to cry, but i guess my tears didn't bulge out. It went down to my heart, and my heart is aching. Who could i run to ? My bff ? I just lost him . I lost my best friend. How great this is , but at least i know some times you should let the people you love go just for their happiness. I ain't a saint, neither am i a devil. I have feelings too, just that i don't want to show people my vulnerable side to people.
I'm very glad my friend woke up just to hear me cry, and preach to me all the things. He sucks at making me feel happier, but he woke me up. " Dont let history repeat itself " . I'm very thankful for his preach, especially the fact that he has a plane to catch tomorrow morning , and he stayed up to hear me muffle none understandable words. And bother to preach me. And his right, in life we lose some friends, not everyone is valuable. It had been made a point that i had to leave , and i got to. Life's unfair, but what to do? Life goes on.
This hurt as much some bloody bullet went through my body. But one has to put a stop to all this bullshit. As much as i want to stay, i don't wanna let friendship affects everything. True, a true friend is more important than your bgr. But in this case, maybe we ain't true friend. This is just a totally bullshit. And I'm not gonna look back and regret, cause i done my best and its over
P/s : I hope you're fucking happy you ruin this shit.
Nights , XOXO
